Appt went great!

I know I am a little late updating my blog. But our appointment on the 16th went great! We had our Fetal Echo and everything is looking just like it's supposed to. They also did another anatomy scan and everything there looks perfect as well. All her organs are in the correct place and working like they should be. Other than that, there really isn't much to update about. Our next ultrasound will be on October 14th where we will be getting more pictures like these:

Isn't she just so cute?!

Look at that face!

Yup, still a girl!

4 chamber heart

Profile shot












We are at 21 weeks as of yesterday, only 19 to go!!! Hoping these months go by fast!

Lost and Found Connections Abound

I just wanted to introduce you all to a great blog I came across while reading a fellow heart mom's blog. They offer a list of blogs for everyone needing help and support at the moment. The blog is Lost and Found Connections Abound. You can submit your own blog as well.
One of their links is all about pregnancy and infant loss, I haven't read much on it yet but I do plan on it. Here is the link to the pregnancy and infant loss support page. This page contains a list of blogs on people going through the same thing as many of my followers.

On other news, everything here is still going great! I have been feeling Leyna move more and more. It's only once or twice a day, but the movements are getting stronger! We will be going in for our fetal echo next Thursday, the 16th. We will also be getting another ultrasound to check out how she's growing. I can't wait to see more pictures of her!

Here is the link to the blog I was reading when I came across LFCA. She is a new "heart mom to be" and could use lots of support.

Dear Leyna

People notice there's a special glow around you.

You grow Surrounded by love.

Never doubting you are wanted;

Only look at the pride and joy in your mother and father's eyes.

And if sometimes between the smiles

There's a trace of tears,

One day You'll understand.

You'll understand

There was once another child

A different child

Who was in their hopes and dreams.

That child will never outgrow the baby clothes

That child will never keep them up at night

In fact, that child will never be any trouble at all.

Except sometimes, in a silent moment,

When mother and father miss so much

That different child.

May hope and love wrap you warmly

And may you learn the lesson forever

How infinitely precious

How infinitely fragile is this life on earth.

One day, as a young woman

You may see another mother's tears

Another father's silent grief

Then you, and you alone

Will understand and offer the greatest comfort.

When all hope seems lost,

You will tell them

With great compassion,

"I know how you feel,

I'm only here

Because my mother tried again."

by Pandora MacMillian

Leyna Faye McCrow

As you know, we will be having a heart healthy baby girl this January! It feels so good to say "heart healthy". We are so excited that we will be able to have a "normal" pregnancy from here on out. It's something I have never gotten to experience. I don't have to worry about what's going to happen after she's born. I don't have to ask myself questions like "Will we ever get to bring her home?" "Will she survive open heart surgery?" and "What's will the future with a heart baby be like?" I wish more than anything that Hailey was here and we knew what it felt like to live life with our heart baby, but it's also so wonderful to know we won't have to worry about these things with our new little girl. I can't even describe how it feels, we're just so relieved to be having a healthy baby.
During the ultrasound as the technician was looking at her heart, she was very quiet and didn't say much. She knew our past and so we were getting really worried. My heart was about to come out of my chest it was racing so fast. But finally she typed "4 CH" on the screen! What a relief that was! She really had us worried for a minute! After she was all done with the scanning, the doctor came in and told us that everything looked perfect! She's growing just like she's supposed to, along with that 4 chamber heart of hers!
We decided on the name Leyna (pronounced lay na) it means "Little Angel" and "Bright and Shinning Light" because she really is!
We have the actual fetal echo on September 16th to confirm the 4 chambers and to take a detailed look at her heart. But we at least know for sure that there are 4 chambers! Anything else would be a piece of cake compared to HLHS!
I will update as we hear more after our appointment. (Sooner as well).

Who's ready to hear about our day!?

We are having a HEART HEALTHY baby GIRL!! She has a beautiful 4 chamber heart!!

A beautiful 4 chamber heart!!

It's a girl!!!!!

Her cute little profile!






I'll post more later, right now we just wanted to celebrate!!

Tomorrow is the BIG day!

Tomorrow morning we will be going in for our 16 week ultrasound and they are going to take a look at the baby's heart to make sure there are 4 chambers and that the aorta is the correct size. We won't be going for our fetal echo until around 20-22 weeks. But for now, at least we will know of any major defects (even though there will not be any!!) We will also be finding out the gender at this appointment! So exciting! So nervous about the whole thing as well. We know we have only a very small chance of it happening again, but you just never know with these things. We're staying very positive though. If anything happens to be wrong, we are on the next flight to Boston to have a fetal intervention where they are able to to an in utero surgery to try and correct any abnormalities. Even after all we've been through, I still feel an abortion is not something we could handle if something was wrong. But there won't be anything wrong, so nothing to worry about!

So who wants to take any guesses as to what we are having? I'm guessing a heart healthy little GIRL!

I will update tomorrow as soon as I can, we plan on going shopping for baby clothes after our appointment, so it may be a while, but if you're on my facebook I will post an update on my phone as soon as we are done at the appt!

Josh Wilson - Before the Morning

I just wanted to share a song that was actually written for a little boy with HLHS. I have this CD and just love it. It's very hard to find in store, so if you want a copy you may have to order it online. His name is Josh Wilson and the title of the CD is "Life is Not a Snapshot".

Josh Wilson "Before the Morning" 


Do you wonder why you have to 
Feel the things that hurt you? 
If there's a God who loves you, 
Where is He now? 

Maybe, there are things you cant see, 
And all those things are happening 
To bring a better ending. 
Some day, some how, you'll see, you'll see. 

Would you dare, would you dare to believe 
That you still have a reason to sing? 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It cant compare to the joy that's coming. 

So hold on, you gotta wait for the light. 
Press on, and just fight the good fight. 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It's just the dark before the morning. 

My friend, you know how this all ends. 
You know where you're going. 
You just don't know how you'll get there. 
So say a prayer and hold on. 
Cause there's good for those who love God. 
But life is not a snapshot. 
It might take a little time, 
but you'll see the bigger picture. 

Would you dare, would you dare to believe 
That you still have a reason to sing? 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It cant compare to the joy that's coming. 

So hold on, you gotta wait for the light. 
Press on, and just fight the good fight. 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It's just the dark before the morning. 

Yeah, yeah. Before the morning. Yeah, yeah. 
Once you feel the weight of glory 
All your pain will fade to memory. 

Once you feel the weight of glory 
All your pain will fade to memory, Yeah. 

Would you dare, would you dare to believe 
That you still have a reason to sing? 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It cant compare to the joy that's coming. 

Would you dare, would you dare to believe 
That you still have a reason to sing? 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It cant compare to the joy that's coming. 

So hold on, you gotta wait for the light. 
Press on, and just fight the good fight. 
Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 
It's just the hurt before the morning. 

All the pain that you've been feeling 
Its just the dark before the morning. 

Before the morning, Yeah yeah. 
Before the morning.


I believe that our "joy that's coming" is our new little baby. We've already been through the dark, now we are just waiting for our morning. I love you so much Hailey! 


Click here to watch the videos.  One video is the music video to the song, and they also have a video documentary with the father telling the story behind the song. 

Our baby is growing!

We sure had a busy last few weeks. Hailey's first birthday party went well, not as many people showed up as I had hoped but I can understand why someone would not want to attend. It's not your typical "Happy" Birthday party. But we still had a great time. We released balloons at exactly 4:09pm, the time she came into this world. We also got lots of donations that we brought up to Doernbecher Children's Hospital a week later. We still have one more surprise gift that we will be bringing them sometime this month. I will post that when the day comes! 

We just got back on Saturday from a week long vacation in Wisconsin visiting family. We rented a house on the lake with my parents and my brother with his family. I got to meet my niece, Taylor for the first time last week. She is only 2 months older than Hailey is. It was so great to meet her but as the days went on, it was getting harder to put on that happy face. By Wednesday I was so stressed out I just needed to go cry for a while. My amazing husband was right there with me to hold me and support me, he's so wonderful. I just wish it wasn't so hard to be around little girls Hailey's age. Taylor is adorable and a sweet little girl but I couldn't get my mind off the fact that Hailey should be here with us on vacation. She should be getting spoiled by grandparents and playing with her cousins. It was really a wonderful vacation in all, but just a but much with missing Hailey. 

Our last ultrasound went really well. We got lots of good pictures and the Doctor says that so far everything looks great. We had the test where they measure the fluid behind the neck that tests for Down Syndrome (a possible connection to heart defects) and that test was negative. So far so good. Our next appointment will be on August 19th where we will be looking for all 4 chambers of the heart and checking out the Aorta. We will also be finding out the gender on that day! I can't wait to find out how everything is looking. We won't be having a fetal echo until week 22 or so. But at least we will be able to see the 4 chambers in 2 weeks!! 

I also wanted to put a note in about an upcoming NASCAR race. Kenny Wallace will be racing a CHD car, and Hailey's name is on the hood along with many other CHD children. The race will be on August 20th. You can learn more about this car and fundraising site by clicking here.

And here are our newest ultrasound pictures! These are 12 weeks 4 days. 

Here's a profile shot. Do you see the heart above the baby??

Here is another profile shot. 

Our baby's brain.

Here's a shot between the legs. What do you think? Boy? Girl?

Week and day: 14 weeks and 2 days

Belly Button in or out: Still in. :)  Never came out while I was pregnant with Hailey, so I think it may stay in!

Wedding rings on or off: Still on of course!

Food cravings:  Fruit

Food aversions: Everything!

Nausea: Has pretty much gone away!

Energy level: Getting back to normal again

Weight gain:  Still no weight gain yet. 

Mood: Pretty good, getting very excited and anxious for the 19th!

Maternity clothes: They are a must now!

Size of baby: Crown to rump is 3 1/2 to 4 inches (8 to 9.3cm) The size of a lemon and weighs 1 ounce!

Baby's changes:  This week the baby's ears have moved from the neck to the sides of the head. Eyes have been moving gradually from the side of the head to the front of the face. The neck continues to get longer, and the chin no longer rests on the chest. 

Sexual development continues. It is becoming easier to determine male from female by looking at external, genitalia, which are more developed. 

Next appointment: The BIG appt!! It's on August 19th!

What I've been up to: Nothing new, just working after a great vacation with my family! 

Almost to 12 weeks!

This Sunday is a big day. First of all, it would have been Hailey's first birthday. This is going to be a very hard day for us, but we are going to be having a big celebration to remember her beautiful life. I think that's going to make the day a bit easier to get through. We knew this day was coming, I just hope we are able to deal with it. I know she wouldn't want us to be sad but we will be. I can't believe it's already been a year since we first me our daughter. It seemed to have flown by. So have these past 7 1/2 months since she left us. But we will do everything we can to enjoy her special day.

Sunday is also the 12 week mark in our pregnancy. Which is the milestone that most pregnant women hope to achieve because there is now a very low risk of miscarriage. We will be getting another ultrasound this coming Thursday to make sure the baby is growing like it's supposed to. We're hoping around the middle of August is when we will get to find out if it's a boy or girl. We do however have to wait until around 20 weeks to make sure the heart is healthy. But we will be sure to keep you all posted!

I would also like to add a disturbing fact we recently had to deal with. As you know I have been having really bad morning (all day) sickness. So my doctor prescribes me a drug called Phenergan. Well I decided to look it up on safefetus.com to make sure it's in either class A or class B before I was going to take it. And you know what? IT'S BEEN KNOWN TO CAUSE CARDIOVASCULAR DEFECTS IN THE FIRST TRIMESTER!!  I couldn't believe it as I read this. Our doctor is not going to like us when we go back on Thursday. So of course I tossed the pills and I am now just "dealing" with the nausea. Here is the link to the information. I hope you warn other pregnant women to not take this drug after reading this. I know I will be.

On a happier note,

Here is the latest picture of our little peanut at 10 weeks.

And now for the 11 week status updates!

Week and day: 11 weeks and 5 days

Belly Button in or out: Still in. :)  Never came out while I was pregnant with Hailey, so I think it may stay in!

Wedding rings on or off: Still on of course!

Food cravings:  Fruit

Food aversions: Everything!

Nausea: It's very bad! Feeling nauseous 24/7 

Energy level: Can't make it through the day without a nap.

Weight gain: Lost about 8 pounds so far. Which is "okay" during the first trimester only. 

Mood: Excited!!

Maternity clothes: Will be needing them soon!

Size of baby: Between 1 1/2 to 2 1/2 inches (4.4 to 6cm) Weight is about 0.3 ounces (8g) About the size of a large lime!

Baby's changes: Fetal growth is rapid now. The crown to rump length of the baby doubles in the next 3 weeks. The head is almost half the baby's entire length. As the head extends (uncurls or tips backward toward the spine), the chin rises from the chest, and the neck develops and lengthens. Fingernails appear. 

 

External genitalia are beginning to show distinguishing features. Development of the fetus into a male or female is complete in another 3 weeks. 

Next appointment: July 22nd at 10:30am

What I've been up to: Getting ready for Hailey's first birthday BBQ and also preparing to go to Wisconsin to visit my family!

Can you see this?

Just wondering if anyone is able to see my posts. I haven't had any comments on my last 3 posts so I was kinda worrying! That's fine if people don't leave comments, I just want to make sure my posts are going through and I am not getting lost in cyber space!
Just leave me a comment here so I know these are at least showing up and you are able to read them. That way I know I can keep posting and you will keep reading!